Christmas decorations are essential when it comes to conjuring up the atmosphere and, perhaps, reviving the imperishable childlike spirit buried deep within. With that said, there are some rather off-beat exceptions. By that, we mean Christmas decor that casually drops inappropriate innuendos, is unintentionally creepy, or just plain bizarre. And, as it turns out, there’s really no shortage of these kinds of Noel horrors. Without further ado, here’s your little nightmare before Christmas!
A Very Jeremy Corbyn Christmas
Like him or hate him, during the last couple of years, the man surely has caused quite a stir. For better or worse, this has led to Corbyn becoming somewhat of an icon in popular culture. Consequently, the appearance of the controversial labour party leader is not limited only to political satire columns. The man seems to have his own action figure (partially making the better of Corbyn’s uncanny resemblance to the Late Alec Guinness’s Obi Van Kenobi), a garment line, and, by the looks of it, a Battlefront II character. Now, it’s time to have a little Jeremy Corbyn on your Christmas tree! This is for those who cannot stop pondering the current state of political affairs even when the corals hit the high and mulled wine is poured!
Santa Who Has Seen Things
What is it with the toy maker’s penchant for making creepy and slightly off figures that look as if they have some kind of dark, tragic secret stored in their closet? The paint work on this miniature Santa just screams traumatic experience. What’s the point of trying to cheer up your loved ones with a toy or a decor that seems to have been on the other side and returned only to exist as an empty shell of its former self, in the eternal futility of life? Merry Christmas!
Alright, for the sake of cultural and historical accuracy, we must note that Caga Tió is not so much of a weird, Pinocchio-esque Christmas decor as it is more a part of a rather weird Christmas custom professed in Catalonia. To stay within the lines of political correctness, we came up with a PG-friendly translation of Crap Log (the actual translation is much more straight to the point). The cheery bloke is usually supported by a pair of twig-made limbs and wears a red cape, a uniform it maintains from its introduction on December 8th to Christmas Eve itself. For the whole period, the log is constantly fed dried fruits and nuts which is apparently done in order to make the log defecate. Yeah, exactly that. The whole thing is mostly carried out by kids, who, in exchange for their generosity, hope to receive some gifts on the other end of the log.
Hercules, Hercules, Hercules
Now, this decor was just one Hercules away from being pure gold. Had they added another XXS version of the Mythological favourite, this would have been a real meme-worthy Inception twist on the toy. Disclosure, although there’s nothing that specifically indicates this being a Christmas-related item (apart from the twine), it’s been sold as such on Ebay. Even demigods have to make ends meet.
The Last Thing You See Before…
Right, this one is a very contradictory piece of decor. On the one hand, it can be viewed as an intentional “tongue in cheek” commentary on excessive decorating. On the other hand, it’s nothing short of an abomination. To cut it short, if there’s any place that should be spared of the Christmas spirit, then lavatory may take the cake as the most obvious contender.
Lucky Yodeling Christmas Pickle
Before deeming this decor too random for its own good, you have to be informed about its deep-rooted significance in American culture. Although there are numerous theories about its origins, with one of them attributing the whole pickle myth to Germany (who has since debunked the claim), the root of the tradition is actually to be sought right in the United States where the pickle decor became a full-fledged Christmas tree embellishment in the 19th century. The whole point of the tradition is to find the pickle in order to receive additional gifts, or, which is probably somewhat less inspiring for the kiddos seeking the veggie, additional luck for the next year. These days, as you can see, it is possible to acquire pickles that can yodel. Cute as it is, it is not exactly the most aesthetically pleasing decor.
Gävlebocken – The Decor with the Saddest Fate
Now, there’s really nothing inherently weird about this XXL-sized decor piece. Instead, the story revolving around this Swedish installation is actually quite a sad one. Despite being annually exhibited since 1966, the décor has thus far survived only 12 times, being burnt down, kicked to pieces, or overrun by a car for a total of 38 instances. The local authorities are chronically unable to preserve it, making the Gävle Goat something of an endangered species of Christmas decor. Arguably the most frequently destroyed Christmas decoration today, it’s not the Gävle Goat that is weird. It’s the people who demolish it on an annual basis.
Advent Wreath with Additional Elements
Highly detailed decorations are not always the best, especially if you’re trying to juxtapose Christmas aesthetics with the nautical theme. Replace the regular pine boughs with slimy-looking tentacles, and you’ll have a decor straight from a B grade horror flick. At least the kiddies won’t be too fond of touching it. Clearly, this is only for enthusiasts of the deep blue.
Weird Tale with a Beautiful Ending
The last entry, despite being genuinely weird for Christmas decor conservatives or those suffering from arachnophobia, has, quite possibly, the most heartwarming story behind it. While adorning your Christmas tree with spiders and webs might seem a bit off in the better part of the world, it’s a completely regular custom for the Ukrainian people. The reason for this seemingly odd way of making your place cheery is an Eastern European folktale that tells a story of a poor widow who could not afford to decorate a Christmas tree to cheer up her kiddies on Christmas Eve. With no solution in sight, the family went to sleep, waking up to a Christmas tree from head to toe covered in spider webs. As the kids opened windows and the sun touched the web, every inch of it turned into gold and silver linings. From then on out, the family never saw a single day of poverty ever again!
Although there are ample amounts of weird Christmas decor scattered all around the web, our little selection ends here. For those craving a bit more conventional approach, feel free to check out the vast selection of wall decor and photo gift solutions found on our website! Christmas is just around the corner, and it’s the perfect occasion to be prepared for promptly!